Greetings from The Rated R Superstar and Welcome to The House of Hawley...The Dancing Destroyer...The Master of Disaster...The King of Sting...The Count of Monte Fisto...The Warrior of The Wasteland...The Ayatollah of Rock n Rolla....The Mountain of Molten Lust...The One...The Only...Old Man Robert Reid Hawley!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Warning: This blog may contain sexual content, some scary scenes, coarse language, crude content, violence and Charles Bronson's mustache.
Here we go Axemen Football fans.. the moment we have been waiting for since like ummm... November.. read on!
Friday, September 6 - Acadia at Saint Mary's, 7:00pm
Saturday, September 14 - Laval at Acadia, 2:00pm
Friday, September 20 - Acadia at STFX, 7:00pm
Saturday, September 28 - Mount Allison at Acadia, 2:00pm
Saturday, October 5 - Acadia at Saint Mary's, 2:00pm
Friday, October 11 - Saint Mary's at Acadia, 7:00pm
Saturday, October 19 - StFX at Acadia, 2:00pm
Saturday, October 26 - Acadia at Mount Allison, 2:00pm
Saturday, November 2 - Third Place at Second Place, 1:00pm
AUS Championship (Subway Loney Bowl)
Saturday, November 9 - Semifinal Winner at First Place, 1:00pm
Uteck Bowl (Location TBD)
Saturday, November 16 - RSEQ Champion at AUS Champion, TBA
Vanier Cup (Quebec City, Que.)
Saturday, November 23 – Mitchell Bowl Winner vs. Uteck Bowl Winner, TBA
If you will notice, Friday October 11th game against SMU is Friday Night Lights at Raymond Field.. that has not been any nighttime games at Raymond Field in a few yrs. Also if you go back earlier in the schedule you will see that the Axemen will be taking on Laval in Wolfville/ WolfVegas.. a regular season game.. interleague play against the team w/ the 5 MILLION dollar budget and has spring training in Florida.. i won't say too much.. but sometimes i must wonder about even playing field and i wish Axemen Football had a crazy budget like that.. sometimes it takes the right organization/ group/ person w/ deep pockets to come along... esp when we want championships...
I also noticed in the Chronicle Herald today that the Uteck Bowl is set to hit the road.. esp after the disaster in Moncton and instead of returning to the decaying Huskie Stadium, the Bowl will be offered to the winner of the AUS to take on their opponent from the Quebec Conference (More than likely it will be Laval) Excuse me for offering my opinion on the topic, but i think this is the right thing to do.. why have it at Huskie Stadium every year? Make it an extra incentive to win for the teams in the AUS.. if you win.. you get national coverage in your town.. even though you will get those TSN announcers who screw up everyone's name, you get the Uteck Bowl.. i said it yrs ago.. why have a host city? Give it to those who deserve it.. the yr Moncton had it stunk because Moncton has no AUS football team, thus no attachment to the game.. no personal reason to go watch two strange teams.. and it was on a Friday instead of a Saturday.. students couldn't get away from classes to make it up in time.. dummy dummy dummy decisions.. Anyways let the best team win...
Perhaps the "Three-peat" for the Axemen... perhaps...
Anyways folks rejoice and let the AUS football season start on September 6th!
Was looking around the ol internet tonight and saw this post on Facebook.. thought i would re-post because its pretty true about today's youngins....
Hilarious! Growing up without a cell phone If you are 36, or older, you might think this is hilarious!
When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious
diatribes about how hard things were. When they were growing up; what
with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning.... Uphill...
Barefoot... BOTH ways...yadda, yadda, yadda And I remember promising myself that
when I grew up, there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of
crap like that on my kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've
got it! But now that I'm over the ripe old age of forty, I
can't help but look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it
so easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a damn Utopia!
And I hate to say it, but you kids today, you don't know how good you've
got it! 1) I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have the
Internet. If we wanted to know something, we had to go to the damn
library and look it up ourselves, in the card catalog!!
There was no email!! We had to actually write somebody a letter - with a
pen! Then you had to walk all the way across the street and put it in
the mailbox, and it would take like a week to get there! Stamps were 10
3) Child Protective Services didn't care if our
parents beat us. As a matter of fact, the parents of all my friends also
had permission to kick our ass! Nowhere was safe!
were no MP3's or Napsters or iTunes! If you wanted to steal music, you
had to hitchhike to the record store and shoplift it yourself!
5) Or you had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio, and the
DJ would usually talk over the beginning and @#*% it all up! There were
no CD players! We had tape decks in our car. We'd play our favorite
tape and "eject" it when finished, and then the tape would come undone
rendering it useless. Cause, hey, that's how we rolled, Baby! Dig?
6) We didn't have fancy crap like Call Waiting! If you were on the
phone and somebody else called, they got a busy signal, that's it!
7) There weren't any freakin' cell phones either. If you left the
house, you just didn't make a damn call or receive one. You actually had
to be out of touch with your "friends". OH MY GOSH !!! Think of the
horror... not being in touch with someone 24/7!!! And then there's
TEXTING. Yeah, right. Please! You kids have no idea how annoying you
8) And we didn't have fancy Caller ID either! When the
phone rang, you had no idea who it was! It could be your school, your
parents, your boss, your bookie, your drug dealer, the collection
agent... you just didn't know!!! You had to pick it up and take your
9) We didn't have any fancy PlayStation or
Xbox video games with high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari
2600! With games like 'Space Invaders' and 'Asteroids'. Your screen guy
was a little square! You actually had to use your imagination!!! And
there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen..
Forever! And you could never win. The game just kept getting harder and
harder and faster and faster until you died! Just like LIFE!
10) You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was
on! You were screwed when it came to channel surfing! You had to get off
your ass and walk over to the TV to change the channel!!! NO REMOTES!!!
Oh, no, what's the world coming to?!?!
11) There was no
Cartoon Network either! You could only get cartoons on Saturday Morning.
Do you hear what I'm saying? We had to wait ALL WEEK for cartoons.. for Scooby Doo, you
spoiled little rat-bastards!
12) And we didn't have microwaves. If we wanted to heat something up, we had to use the stove! Imagine that!
13) And our parents told us to stay outside and play..and play. all day long.
Oh, no, no electronics to soothe and comfort. And if you came back
inside... you were doing chores!
And car seats - oh, please!
Mom threw you in the back seat and you hung on. If you were lucky, you
got the "safety arm" across the chest at the last moment if she had to
stop suddenly, and if your head hit the dashboard, well that was your
fault for calling "shot gun" in the first place!
exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it too easy.
You're spoiled rotten! You guys wouldn't have lasted five minutes back
in 1970 or any time before!
1. Don't kill someone's teacher. His best student come and kill you.
2. To fix a telephone, open it and close it.
3. Japanese people look Chinese.
4. Large glasses make perfect disguise when everyone is looking for you.
5. Japanese people wear girdles (or kimonos I guess).
6. Japanese people cover up their nipples before they fight.
7. When the camera zooms into a piece of clothing, everyone focuses on the nipples.
8. One Chinese can take on 20+ Karate students.
9. When executing a person, no one behind the condemned will move out of the way.
10. Trying to kill someone with a stone in plain sight is a bad idea.
11. Cracking someone's ribs will kill them.
12. When you are in disguise, people around you will start leaking all the information you need to know.
13. If someone says they're the worst student, they're probably not.
14. If you're strong enough, pivot points of lever gravity will not apply when lifting carriages.
15. When there is a sign for no Chinese or dogs, the guards don't always pay attention.
16. When a telephone wire is just cut, people will have been waiting all day long.
17. Caucasians are significantly stronger than Japanese people.
18. Your hand can also be a hammer for nails.
19. Metal bars wobble when you bend them.
20. Japanese people like mustaches.
21. A good place to hide is a graveyard.
22. Japanese swords are so sharp they will go right through you with no applied force.
23. Random blocks of wood are waiting for you on top of doors.
24. Don't touch angry people.
25. If you kill somebody's teacher answer him why. Why? Why? Why? Why?
26. You can pretend to be a dog and a Japanese guy will give you a tour of the park.
27. When confronted with 20 rifles just start yelling, run at them at top speed and try to drop-kick them.
28. You can eat a lot of paper in front of a group of students.
29. The only way to calm down a grieving realtive is to bang him on the head with a shovel.
30. In 1908 China, Japanese and white people wore suits that apparently came back in the 1970s.
31. When a ticked off Chinese guy tells you to leave.. leave.
32. It is necessary to disguise as a telephone repairman in order to find
out that Russian wrestlers are very strong. It is okay to risk the real
repairman showing up and asking: "What the hey?" While you are in the
boss's office, don't kill him, along with the other goons. Wait till it
is night, so that everybody will wake up and ask: "What's the *beep*ing
33. If you're from "Rusher" (Russia), and can say "Let Me Take Care O Him", sounding
like Sylvester Stallone, and Dolph Lundgren at the same time, you can
get into a Bruce Lee Movie.
34. When it rains, during a funeral in Shanghai, the dirt will not get wet.
35. Don't take a flying leap while screaming at a bunch of policemen with their guns out. You might make them mad at you.
36. White and modern Asian people in 1908 (or whenever) wore the same hairstyles as people in the early 1970s.
37. Pick up two Japanese guys off the floor, spin them around, and they'll morphed into rag dolls.
38. I don't care how old he is,Steve Martin is the only white haired man in 1970s karate movies
39. Jackie Chan makes a good stunt man
40. "Scram" is English for "Get the FUCK out of here NOW"
Ahhh! Good ol "Escape From The Bronx"! aka "Bronx Warriors 2" the follow up to 1982's "1990: The Bronx Warriors! I was very excited to see this killcount tribute to Escape From The Bronx.. the bodycount for the movie is pretty high.. the only bad part about this killcount is that it is not every one in the movie as the dudes in the silver suits, aka the "Disinfestation Annihilation Squad" led by Henry Silva ran up a pretty high bodycount on their own while they were disposing of all the remaining citizens of the run down Bronx...
Anyone remember Henry Silva being on Buck Rogers?
I would still love to know what the heck happened to Mark Gregory? Oh well...
1) Dramatic scenes are drowned out with Jimmy Page
2) Rocket Launchers are only good on enemies who are in groups..
3) Doing crimes in private means witnessing public executions
4) A zip gun has the range and accuracy of a hundred or more feet
5) Backgroud checks aren't needed to secure a postal address
6) Getting high before a night of crime always is productive
7) Chicken is good and likeable
8) Stuffed Cabbage smells wonderful
9) A firearm is illegal within city limits
10) It's okay to violate constitutional rights
11) Due Process doesn't exist when it comes to gang members
12) The unidentified shooter was a "good shot"
13) And he was better than anyone in the department
14) Sometimes you can't have both
15) An elephant gun leaves a big mess
16) When constitutional rights are violated, you can sue.
17) Grand Theft Auto is capital offense
18) When someone has a nail go through their foot, they are "hurt man"
19) You can die from a broken arm
20) When faced with a riot, instead of using a gun,bat,or knife, a plunger is a suitable weapon
21) Gang leaders have a Gangs R Us. They can call up another gang and get more "guys" whenever they feel like it.
22) Kersey can get any women after a total of dull conversation for 3 minutes. He can also be 30 years her senior too.
23) Harassing a man and his wife for 5 dollars doesn't always net you 5 dollars
24) They had no business in killing the Giggler. None at all.
25) When falling from a 6 story building one flails their arms behind their body. (obvious dummy)
26) a lady should never get involved with Kersey because they always end up dead.
27) If you have an apartment window next to a fire escape, leave it open so
people can walk through it. In addition, leave the front door to your
apartment open, so not to inconvenience them with having to open it.
28) Tire Irons show up magically in the most desperate of situations.
29) A .38 caliber revolver never runs out of ammo.
30) Eating Ice Cream and swinging your camera around nets you a free kill.
31) When one lone man stands alone against the local creeps, the local
populace will fight back with guns that they could have put to use
before but didn't.
32) You avoid being shot when running down a street with no cover to speak
of, while gunning down people on rooftops or fire escapes.
33) When your Wildy .475 Mangum handgun runs out of ammo and you know you
had only two clips and you used both...search your pockets frantically
for a 3rd clip.
34) People at that rathole of an apartment building just continue to lay in
bed reading as Kersey, and then a creep, enter bedroom windows and walk
35) Bulletproof vests protect you from knives -- who would have guessed?
36) A wildy .475 Magnum, a 35 Cal. Machine Gun and a Rocket Launcher...one
Sniper Rifle - a bullet to the head of fraker from long range under the
cloak of darkness. Priceless.
37) It is humanly possible to ram a guys head through jail cell bars
38) Gang members can sense when they're leader just bought the bullet. They respond 1/2 a second later by screaming bloody murder.
39) When shot with a zip gun, windows explode OUTWARDS.
40) Kersey is a man that doesn't run.